Dad's care manager came round and we talked about social services' rehabilitation plans for him. They're aiming for him to be as independent as possible. The first step is for him to take public transport by himself. So far, he can get on and off buses with somebody around just in case. The physios are going to take it one step at a time. For example, making sure that he gets on OK at one bus stop, then skidding quickly to meet him as he gets off at the next one...
I took Dad to Chinatown - it was a big trip with brilliant sunshine one minute than thudding hailstones the next. But we made it. Only afterwards did I find out that it was one of those Chinese 'special days' i.e. when the weather /environment 'changes' and old / sick people should take extra care and not over-exert themselves.
The following day, an 'escort' came round to take Dad to the shops. I always laugh when they're referred to as escorts. Can't help it. Anyhow, it was another Nigerian lady. Or rather girl. Very pretty and petite and nice enough. Not willing to wheel Dad around in a wheelchair though, so they took the bus to Sainsburys, chased after his shopping list and bussed back, all within an hour.
Mum has also had some scans done for her health problems. Thankfully they seem to confirm a diagnoses fairly easy to deal with.
Friday, June 29, 2007
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Day 134: Bracing himself
It's great to see how much Dad can do now - he's pretty independent, at least at home. He can wash his own hair, make his own breakfast, sort out his own clothes, handwash his underwear... he's managed to get his favourite carer to come in three mornings a week to help wash him.
Took Dad to a clinic on Harrow Road. It's some special clinic which fixes leg braces to help support you when you walk. Dad has a temporary one already which he likes. We waited for an hour - Dad kept telling me to go check that they hadn't forgotten us. I was reluctant, but did as he said. The receptionist just kept saying he didn't know when we'd be seen. In the meantime, tens of patients came and went ahead of us.
Turned out they had forgotten us.
So in a rush, they did fit us in. They were very nice and apologetic but I was pretty pissed off. Anyhow Dad's new brace is massive so they cut it down. It's a great help, but if he becomes overly reliant on it, he won't be able to walk without it.
Took the bus back home. Ken Livingstone's initiative of free bus travel for schoolkids is all very well, but they cause huge crowds at the bus stops. Most of the kids are fine but the naughty few drive the bus drivers insane and they start snapping at all and sundry. Anyhow, as I said before, it's usually the schoolkids who give their seat up to Dad, while able-bodied adults hog the priority seats, pretending they're asleep or that there's something amazingly interesting out the window...
Took Dad to a clinic on Harrow Road. It's some special clinic which fixes leg braces to help support you when you walk. Dad has a temporary one already which he likes. We waited for an hour - Dad kept telling me to go check that they hadn't forgotten us. I was reluctant, but did as he said. The receptionist just kept saying he didn't know when we'd be seen. In the meantime, tens of patients came and went ahead of us.
Turned out they had forgotten us.
So in a rush, they did fit us in. They were very nice and apologetic but I was pretty pissed off. Anyhow Dad's new brace is massive so they cut it down. It's a great help, but if he becomes overly reliant on it, he won't be able to walk without it.
Took the bus back home. Ken Livingstone's initiative of free bus travel for schoolkids is all very well, but they cause huge crowds at the bus stops. Most of the kids are fine but the naughty few drive the bus drivers insane and they start snapping at all and sundry. Anyhow, as I said before, it's usually the schoolkids who give their seat up to Dad, while able-bodied adults hog the priority seats, pretending they're asleep or that there's something amazingly interesting out the window...
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Days 118-133: Back in the UK again
My husband is suffering terribly with back and neck pain. He's tried chiropracty, physio, pain killers, muscle relaxants, acupuncture, heat pads... he's had x-rays, MRI scans and all to no avail.
And I'm back in England leaving him to suffer by himself. Poor soul. It's debilitating and depressing for him. He says he can sympathise more with the frustration and depression that dad suffers from.
So yes, back in the UK to see dad who was looking MUCH better than when I left him. His left hand is not so swollen and he can open and close it. He says his tastebuds are coming back and most importantly, he seemed in very high spirits. Wonder though if the depression will kick in later.
Mum was also quite chirpy. But she did pointedly remark how tough it had been for her.
p.s. EVAair rocks!
And I'm back in England leaving him to suffer by himself. Poor soul. It's debilitating and depressing for him. He says he can sympathise more with the frustration and depression that dad suffers from.
So yes, back in the UK to see dad who was looking MUCH better than when I left him. His left hand is not so swollen and he can open and close it. He says his tastebuds are coming back and most importantly, he seemed in very high spirits. Wonder though if the depression will kick in later.
Mum was also quite chirpy. But she did pointedly remark how tough it had been for her.
p.s. EVAair rocks!
Saturday, June 23, 2007
Days 110-117: flights booked
Bought my ticket to the UK and mum's bought her ticket to go to Beijing - we'll pass each other like ships in the night in London...
Dad's hospital visit went well - the specialist doesn't seem to think there is much else to worry about.
Mum also took Dad to see the Chinese doctor in Potter's Bar. He was also pleased with Dad's progress.
They celebrated their granddaughter's first birthday by having dim sum in Dalston with my brother's family. Aaaah.
Dad's hospital visit went well - the specialist doesn't seem to think there is much else to worry about.
Mum also took Dad to see the Chinese doctor in Potter's Bar. He was also pleased with Dad's progress.
They celebrated their granddaughter's first birthday by having dim sum in Dalston with my brother's family. Aaaah.
Thursday, June 21, 2007
Day 109: who cares about the carer?
It was mum's birthday. I called her up to wish her many happy returns.
She started crying. My brother's family wouldn't be visiting that day and my brother can't get the day off to take my dad for his upcoming hospital appointment, so Mum would have to do it.
As a reminder: my parents are divorced, but my mum - due to living circumstances - is my dad's primary carer. Needless to say, she felt trapped. I remember what it was like when I was there: control freak mei, irritable, irrational and completely highly strung. It must be ten times worse for her.
She also has some health issues of her own to sort out.
I better start booking a flight to see them soon and give mum a well-deserved break.
She started crying. My brother's family wouldn't be visiting that day and my brother can't get the day off to take my dad for his upcoming hospital appointment, so Mum would have to do it.
As a reminder: my parents are divorced, but my mum - due to living circumstances - is my dad's primary carer. Needless to say, she felt trapped. I remember what it was like when I was there: control freak mei, irritable, irrational and completely highly strung. It must be ten times worse for her.
She also has some health issues of her own to sort out.
I better start booking a flight to see them soon and give mum a well-deserved break.
Monday, June 18, 2007
Days 98-108: the hundred day's mark
It's been a hundred days since dad had his stroke. In my personal opinion, I think his physical progress has been highly impressive. He couldn't walk, or eat, or go to the loo before. Now he can walk by himself with a walking stick, feed himself fine, and take care of his toilet needs.
Sure, it's not a full recovery. His left arm and hand are not very helpful and dad's had to re-learn how to do many things one-handed. But I'm not sure stroke victims ever recover 100%. He's still been lucky and can do many many things.
His mood fluctuates from being very chipper and positive, to depressed and resigned. I'm hoping the chipper and positive will pull through.
He doesn't fall down so often and the physio has taught him a great exercise to help him get up from the floor should he do so.
He's also received a plastic leg brace that fits under his foot and behind his left shin. It gives support to him when he walks and he's found it a great help.
All small steps to independence and hopefully leading the lifestyle that he was used to before.
Sure, it's not a full recovery. His left arm and hand are not very helpful and dad's had to re-learn how to do many things one-handed. But I'm not sure stroke victims ever recover 100%. He's still been lucky and can do many many things.
His mood fluctuates from being very chipper and positive, to depressed and resigned. I'm hoping the chipper and positive will pull through.
He doesn't fall down so often and the physio has taught him a great exercise to help him get up from the floor should he do so.
He's also received a plastic leg brace that fits under his foot and behind his left shin. It gives support to him when he walks and he's found it a great help.
All small steps to independence and hopefully leading the lifestyle that he was used to before.
Thursday, June 14, 2007
Days 90-97: Going it alone
Dad was very pleased with himself when I called him up.
He'd been down to the Post Office all by himself. The Post Office is probably only a 50-metre walk from our block. But it's a huge trip for someone who has had to re-learn how to walk.
He hadn't told anyone he was going to make the trip though - which is potentially dangerous. It's true that there would be plenty of people around to help if, say, he'd had a fall. But he's still quite vulnerable by himself.
"Don't tell your mother," he said, "or she'll be angry."
Of course he told him herself as soon as she got home.
He'd been down to the Post Office all by himself. The Post Office is probably only a 50-metre walk from our block. But it's a huge trip for someone who has had to re-learn how to walk.
He hadn't told anyone he was going to make the trip though - which is potentially dangerous. It's true that there would be plenty of people around to help if, say, he'd had a fall. But he's still quite vulnerable by himself.
"Don't tell your mother," he said, "or she'll be angry."
Of course he told him herself as soon as she got home.
Tuesday, June 12, 2007
Days 83-89: Assessment
Apparently dad needs to be assessed for care i.e. see if he'll have to cough up any money for the help he's getting from the council. Our care provider isn't sure if this is retroactive. The physio though says definitely not (phew!). I trust her knowledge on this.
On the positive front, dad now does leg exercises on the front balcony every evening. He's also been out for dim sum with my brother's family. And he has the energy to berate me for not getting a Carl Zeiss lens with my new Sony dSLR (he must be kidding!)
Not so good though is the lapse now and then into the 'nobody understands me' depression. Well, it's true - how can any of us actually know what he's going through?
On the positive front, dad now does leg exercises on the front balcony every evening. He's also been out for dim sum with my brother's family. And he has the energy to berate me for not getting a Carl Zeiss lens with my new Sony dSLR (he must be kidding!)
Not so good though is the lapse now and then into the 'nobody understands me' depression. Well, it's true - how can any of us actually know what he's going through?
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